Incorrectly thinking oneself to be a woman imprisoned in the incorrect body, a detransitioner described how he was “brainwashed” into undergoing gender reassignment surgery.
The 32-year-old Massachusetts resident who goes by the moniker Shape Shifter was raised in a Muslim nation in the Balkans where even being homosexual was taboo, but he thought that if he transitioned to female he would finally be comfortable with himself.
He argues that Fenway Health in Massachusetts, which provided him with a referral letter, has been prejudiced by pro-trans activists.
Dr. Sherman Leis of The Philadelphia Center for Transgender Surgery carried out the actual procedure. He is considered as the gender reassignment surgeon with the greatest expertise in the United States.
Shape Shifter, a homosexual male who loved presenting in a feminine manner, rapidly recognized he had made a huge error once the surgery was over in 2015. He was then in his mid-twenties.
His operations, which included having his penis removed and having a “neo-vagina” made, are permanent.
They have left him with a number of mental health issues, such as sadness and a decreased sex-drive, as well as osteoporosis, scoliosis, a “vagina” that his body misinterprets as a wound and attempts to repair.
Shape Shifter thought the first transformation into a woman would finally allow him to be content in his own skin, but instead he felt much more miserable than before the operation, recognizing that he was only a male who loved acting femininely.
He still has long hair and wears cosmetics, but he believes that guys like him should be encouraged to embrace their femininity without feeling compelled to undergo surgical transition.
Shape Shifter, 32, who was born a man but later transitioned to a woman, turned back. Due to the procedures, he no longer has a penis and a functioning vagina.
During a more than hour-long conversation with Blaire White, 28, who is transgender herself, he described how following his first operation to become a woman, he unexpectedly had a severe depression.
Shape discussed how the replacement vagina that had been created for him using tissue from his penis fell well short of expectations and left him unable to have sex during the interview, which was uploaded on YouTube and has almost 500,000 views.
“I was content for perhaps a month or two, but following surgery I became much more sad.” My neo-vagina began to tighten. After I gave up my penis, I anticipated spreading my legs and being f****d, but it never really occurred.
“I was posting about how miserable I was online, and many people assumed it was due to the surgery… but I had no energy, I was so sluggish, I had brain fog, and I had absolutely no sex desire.” After that, I discovered that no tranny-chasers were still after me, and I was now vying for males with other women.
If individuals were aware of the potential difficulties and regret that may result from surgery, according to Shape, many would think twice about having it done in the first place.
What was it like to “miss your penis,” White enquired of Shape.
“I simply wanted to undergo the operation, then I wanted to fit in and finish my transformation.” I had no sex desire before I began taking testosterone. Shape said, “I switched from liking sex to avoiding it.
I miss worrying endlessly about sex, money, and my profession as an ordinary guy. Being heteronormative and acting emotionally was awful. I now feel like a male stuck in a woman’s body.
It is quite upsetting for me to know that I will never be able to have my penis back. Even though I want it back, I can’t. I’ve had bad operations, and now having sex is stressful for me.
Shape claims that after his initial transition, he now dreams of having a penis in addition to having a vagina.
White, the host, enquired as to Shape’s difficulty in changing his gender.
Shape cautions others who may be contemplating transitioning to thoroughly explore their choices in advance by addressing Blaire White, 28, a transgender woman who is also transgender.
“These detransitioners regret having the procedures, but since they had the surgeries, these activist physicians see them as an adversary, and they can’t even receive aid to have the surgeries revised because trans surgeons despise detransitioners?” White proposed.
Pretty much, Shape said in reply.
What they don’t tell you is that once your first surgery didn’t go well and your second one didn’t go well, eventually nobody wants to touch other surgeons’ work because they don’t want to associate their name with a challenging case. But even more than that, the one thing they don’t tell you is that once your first surgery didn’t go well and your second one didn’t go well. There is more scar tissue and difficulties with each visit.
Shape said that despite desiring to detransition, he is content to present as a woman and to dress as one.
I recently identified as a woman, but I altered my papers or I was indoctrinated by the trans community while everyone was libbed out and sipping kool-aid. I only take pleasure in looking feminine and having long hair.
In a lengthy conversation that lasted over an hour, Blaire White, a trans woman, questioned Shape Shifter about what it was like to “miss your penis” now that he is once again a man.
Shape claims that he is now navigating his sexuality.
“Now that I think about it, I don’t believe my mind was able to understand what was occurring.” I only ever experienced what it’s like to be a guy on estrogen, even when I was a woman. I am now unable to resume my former life as a conventional guy.
The presenter said, “I will never understand what it’s like to be a woman, at least physiologically.”
Shape argued that there is no long-term study on the effects of taking all of the synthetic hormones on his body.
I’ll need to take some kind of hormone, and because I already have osteoporosis, it will only be estrogen. If I don’t, my condition will worsen. I was hormone-free for over seven years. The hormones I’m receiving are comparable to those menopausal women get.
Shape said how undergoing the surgeries—which left him without a functioning penis or vagina—and being forced to take hormones for the rest of his life makes him feel as if a medical experiment gone terribly wrong.
As Shape admitted, “It’s transphobic to say it, but once I’ve gone through the system, I 100% feel like I was part of some terrible medical and societal experiment – only nobody checked in on me.”
“If I had committed suicide, I wouldn’t have been been counted in any statistics.” They would probably simply dismiss me as the result of some other problem. In addition, I’ve spent a lot of money. I’ve toured the whole nation and attended every consultation in an effort to find assistance.
If individuals were aware of the potential difficulties and remorse that might occur in the minutes after transitioning, according to Shape, many would think twice about having surgery in the first place. However, he thinks that if surgeons made any reference to such facts, it would be “bad for business.”
Shape has attributed his present predicament to Fenway Health, a Boston, Massachusetts-based LGBT health care and advocacy group.
One of my greatest errors was going to Fenway Health. Many of their employees identify as LGBT, and one of my therapists, as far as I know, was trans. She would understand me, so at first I thought that was nice, but now I see that she was prejudiced. It’s kind of like, ah, an activist hospital, you know?
“I believe that if I had spent the last ten years extending the concept of what it means to be a guy rather than attempting to fit in and be a heteronormative woman, my life would have been better and more fruitful.
I have no actual idea what is ahead. To determine what real trans is, we must return to the scientific lab. Do you want surgery or hormone therapy?
“I f***ed up my life, I could have been so much more,” the speaker said.
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